Random Drabbles
by Keydieh Hurst
Summary: I'll keep adding random drabbles created with Halrloprillalar's Drabble-Matic. It's hilarious.
1. The Battle for Cucumber

1**The Battle For The Cucumber**

Inside the wardrobe, Kathryn kicked her cucumber. She had been busy with the cucumber for hours and now wanted nothing more than a soft cuddle or a hard massage from her lover Chakotay.

She said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden her hot Chakotay appeared at the door, grinning frickingly.

"Put down the cucumber," Chakotay said smashingly. "Unless you want me to kick that cucumber on your ear."

Kathryn put down the cucumber. She was warm. She had never seen Chakotay so cold before and it made her green.

Chakotay picked up the cucumber, then withdrew a replicator from his face. "Don't be so warm," Chakotay said with a cold grimace. "A flea bit my mouth this morning, and everything became blue. Now with this cucumber and this replicator I can smashingly rule the world!"

Kathryn clutched her yellow mouth lazily. This was her lover, her hot Chakotay, now staring at her with a cold face.

"Fight it!" Kathryn shouted. "The flea just wants the cucumber for his own hot devices! He doesn't love you, not the soft way I do!"

Kathryn could see Chakotay trembling lazily. Kathryn reached out her ear and touched Chakotay's face smashingly. She was hot, so hot, but she knew only her yellow love for Chakotay would break the flea's spell.

Sure enough, Chakotay dropped the cucumber with a thunk. "Oh, Kathryn," he squealed. "I'm so soft, can you ever forgive me?"

But Kathryn had already moved inside the wardrobe. Like crazy rabbits on drugs, she pressed her ear into Chakotay's face. And as they fell together in a blue fit of love, the cucumber lay on the floor, green and forgotten.


	2. Yellow Occurence

1**A Yellow Occurrence**

Kathryn paced up and down, jiggling her mouth. Her very good friend, Mary Sue Cucumber, had arranged to meet her here inside the wardrobe. "I have something green to tell you," she had said.

Mary Sue Cucumber was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Kathryn expected to see her bounce up, her soft hair streaming behind her and her red eyes aglow.

Kathryn heard footsteps, but they seemed rather blue for a delicate and cold girl like Mary Sue Cucumber, whose tread was hot. She turned around and found Chakotay staring at her.

"What are you doing here?" Chakotay said frickingly. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."

Kathryn had said that, but now she was beginning to wish she hadn't acted so fuckingly. "Mary Sue Cucumber asked to meet me here." As she gazed at Chakotay, her face began to throb smashingly.

"Oh," Chakotay said, lazily. "I'll just go then."

"Wait," Kathryn said and caught Chakotay by his ear. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Yes," Chakotay said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like crazy rabbits on drugs.

From behind a replicator, Mary Sue Cucumber watched with a hard light in her warm eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Kathryn/Chakotay". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the flea from extinction.


	3. Cold Love

1**Cold Love**

Kathryn finished packing. Ever since Chakotay, her own true love, had been lost at sea, Kathryn had been red.

There was nothing left for her anymore, nothing kicked her, all was hot. So today, Valentine's Day, she was going inside the wardrobe to become a hard replicator.

Just then, there was a yellow knock at the door. Kathryn opened it and stood there lazily for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising her ear.

When Kathryn came to, Chakotay was holding her face and looking soft. "My love," Chakotay said smashingly, "I'm sorry for the green shock. I've been shipwrecked on a blue island for the last ten years, living like crazy rabbits on drugs. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my mouth in the wreck. Can you still love me?"

Kathryn could hardly believe her Chakotay had returned. "I will always love you, mouth or no mouth. Besides, you can cover it up with a cucumber."

They embraced fuckingly and vowed to never be parted again.

And all was warm.


End file.
